Do we live in an “angry” world? Seems everywhere one turns someone is “angry” about something! What does one really need to understand in order to control the emotional, stressful, hateful, sometimes extremely violent, enraged, or even vengeful, outbursts or other displays of anger, which include deep-rooted bitterness and even clamming up (silent treatment)? How does an individual find genuine healing from the conflicts within one’s own heart/spirit, as well as others’ hurt feelings, the experiences of social isolation, and a trail of damaged relationships spoiled by uncontrolled and improperly managed “anger” which is horrifically destructive?
Proverbs 29:11 declares:
A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back.
In Colossians 3:8 faithful believers are reminded of their strength through new life in Christ Jesus:
But now you also, put them all aside: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth.
James 1:19-21 also speaks plainly and distinctly:
But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.
Yes, we all know, and are possibly too familiar with, the words of human justification, reasoning/reckoning, and rationalization — “I just can’t/couldn’t help it!” or the blame-shifting response of _______________ (the devil, whomever, whatever) made me do it!”
I’m often amazed how Christians stumble right into this lie and fail to understand that “anger” and what we do with our “anger” is a choice (that’s even true in a case of being “angry without sin” as referenced in Ephesians 4:26). People routinely get angry at others, situations, things, circumstances, themselves, and even God, but in each event, one ultimately decides if “anger” is the reasonable choice/option.
We even choose how much anger to display, and selectively pick the style exhibited to various people, generally based upon feelings and the condition of existing, or non-existing relationships with that individual, thing, circumstance, or situation. In addition, many will choose “anger” to manipulate, control or dominate a certain individual/situation. Being or becoming “angry” may also be used as a form of communication or emotional expression to those we hold dear (loved ones, close friends, spouses, children, etc.). If that is the case, one must ask, “what is actually being communicated?” because “anger” is a devastating, destructive and divisive force that must be checked in the lives of every true follower of Jesus Christ.
Consider Proverbs 14:29:
He who is slow to anger has great understanding, But he who is quick-tempered exalts folly.
Do parents refuse to hug, love, or even properly discipline their children because they are angry? Do husbands and wives deny one another care, concern, and intimacy because of their anger? Do employees waste time, or employers refuse proper compensation due to anger? Are friendships damaged, ruined, and even severed on a routine basis because of anger? It just goes on and on, invading lives and our society! Did KKK members formerly hang American black men because they were angry? Are police officers of all nationalities being assassinated today because of anger? Billy Graham once said, “Hot heads and cold hearts never solved anything.”
TRUTH: Either we control our “anger” or “anger” will control us, because one’s “anger” is always that of one’s own choosing! In reality, that’s the first step to healing … recognizing that any time you’re angry, you determine that this is the path you prefer, and any emotional displays of that “anger” is also your own choice.
Second, when dealing with “anger” one must run headlong to the Lord! He has promised to be our strength and help in any/every time of trouble (See Psalm 46:1) … any unbridled, sinful anger, is trouble for you and everyone around you!
Psalm 37:8
Cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing.
Third, in the life of a true Christian, unchecked “anger” generally represents a lack of godly character, and a loss of control over one’s own thoughts and behavior/actions. This fails to represent righteousness, but instead, the sinful nature of a carnal/fleshly mind that should be surrendered to God’s alteration! (See Romans 8:5-8).
By learning to properly handle anger, we will empower healing of damaged relationships and make our daily lives more peaceful, rewarding, and meaningful … all to HIS glory!
Together, let’s rid Christ’s Church of this menace … anger! — PF